After you ejaculate, it takes some time for your body to get an erection again. The time between your ejaculation and the onset of your next erection is called refractory period.
This is one of the cases where men have truly been discrimated by mother nature, because women do not have a refractory period. Well, they do have another kind of period though, so maybe we shouldn’t really complain about the cards we’ve been played 😉
Average refractory period?
There really is no average in this case. In general it’s shorter for young men than it is for old men. Some men can regain an erection even fast just a couple of seconds, while other men need hours. These are the two extremes of the spectrum.
Even for the same man it can differ each time. So one time you have sex and might be ready to go again after just three minutes, and another time it might take your “little friend” 40 minutes to stand up again.
The vast majority of men need to give their penis a break time of around 15-50 minutes before their penis will feel excitable again. The reason is simply that the excitable membrane in your penis needs a “reset” before it’s ready to react to stimulation again after you’ve ejaculated already.
Diet
What you eat actually affects your libido. Eating lots of fresh fruits can help you not just to shorten your refrac period, but also to have stronger, harder and bigger erections. I found that certain supplements (like astaxanthin and yohimbe) really can have substantial effects.
The theory is that these supplements tend to influence your hormone levels in a way that you’ll be able to perform better sexually.
Exercise
Physical exercise can actually help you to get an erection after having an orgasm. However, you need several months of regular exercise to notice an improvement, so I’m not sure if this is the kind of advice you’ve been looking for. Just saying that if you’re not doing regular exercise, it’s one of the best things you can do to improve the quality of your health and wellbeing, and heck, even your mental health.
No Stress
Now a lot of men, when they try to regain their erection after an orgasm and it doesn’t work, they get really frustrated and upset and even angry, and guess what: that’s not helping.
In fact, men get an erection most easily when they are very relaxed mentally. I’m sure you’ve had that experience where you where in a kind of half-dreaming state of consciousness, kind of like a daydream, and you got a hard-on. Or the morning glory when you wake up in the morning. Relaxation really helps to regain an erection after orgasm.
Don’t try to force yourself to regain an erection. If it’s not working, just give it a bit more time and keep following the advice I laid out here on a regular basis to train yourself. Slow but steady improvement will work for you too.
Being able to perform awesome in bed is especially important when you’re having sex with a woman who has trouble having orgasms…
Hey there! Do you use Twitter? I’d like to follow you because that’s the best way for me to know when you publish something new. I’m
undoubtedly enjoying your blog and look forward to new posts.
Hi Ben, thanks. We’re setting up a twitter account 🙂
where can i buy those supplements?
@Charles: easiest place is probably amazon.com
I exercise regularly but I still have a long refractory period. Any ideas?
i can get going again after 10 seconds, no problem for me.
@justin: not sure whether i wanna believe a statement like that from a guy who uses a fake name…
I found L-Dope also helps
I think you mean L-Dope 🙂
I really wan to know how to get going faster. The first time I always ejaculate very quick and after that i need like half an hour to get hard again and then i can go longer but its annoying and i feel a bit ashamed about that first time so fast if i can bring it down to 5 minutes i am so happy already!
@Christian: Just try doing the things that we mentioned here, I’m sure you’ll see some improvements.
Dude, it is absolutely normal to need a bit more time as you get older. Just take things at a measured pace, and you don’t need to reload your gun so quickly. You can blow her mind with one shot.
@Old Hand: Sure, that’s fine, whatever style make you and your lady happy 🙂
Is it save if I just put astaxanthin in his meals? I am married and want to help my hubby to have better sex, but I don’t want him to know about it. Is there any risk?
@Jessica: I really think you should have an open conversation with your hubby about this. Don’t just put some stuff in his food he doesn’t know about. If you can’t have an honest conversation about sex with your husband, then you should have a conversation about being able to have open conversations with the person you’re supposed to share your intimate life with…
I guess for me it’s stress. Just can’t switch it off, at any time I can receive a message and if I don’t respond quickly it could cause delays. Not sure what I can do about it, but I feel it’s costing me…
@Goran: meditation, relaxation techniques, yoga, breathing exercises, all work fine. There are many options for you. The cool thing is, when you’re stressed out, doing these things actually CREATES MORE TIME THAN IT COSTS!
I take about 20 minutes to half an hour, I think that’s still ok. Just sometimes wanna impress her…
@Alexander: Yep, totally fine if that’s what you want! 🙂
what about bananas??? do they help???
@Gabriel: just eating bananas won’t solve your problem…
L-DOPA, L-DOPA, L-DOPA! THAT’S all I gotta say…
@David: the reason why we don’t recommend L-Dopa is because there are some serious potential side effects.
what about cialis? it’s a bit of trouble to actually get it, but i think it really helps shortening the refractory period…
@Christopher: I don’t recommend using cialis on a regular basis.
When you learn how to “clamp down” right before your orgasm, you don’t need to worry about your refractory period at all! It’s amazing man. You can have a full-blown orgasms without actually ejaculating (nonejaculatory orgasm). And then you can just stay hard and keep pumping away. Pretty effing amazing!!!
Hiya! I just wanted to tell you I think you guys totally have false expectations. You don’t need to shorten your refractory period or anything like that. Why do you feel you need to be a pornstar? This is real life folks! It’s ok to cum and wanting to take a break. No shame at all in that. Just stay cool. Relax. Take it easy. Take your time for foreplay and get her in the mood first. Stretch the whole thing out. Use your lips, use your tongue, use your fingers. You can still carry her to heaven like that, that’ll be more than enough!!!
For me, Suldenafil works fine. You can order it online.
just google “male multiple orgasm” and you’ll find plenty of good infos